Skip to content

Phuket

May 13, 2012

20120513-181438.jpg

Everyone knows Phuket is a horrible place. It’s filled with touts, scammers, cheats, whores, dope pushers, drunks, commies, and assholes. I felt at home right away.

By Phuket, of course, I mean Patong. I’ve heard nothing but bad things about Phuket in general and Patong specifically, but it happened to be right on my route. Plus, it’s famous, and I felt like spending weeks in southern Thailand without going to Patong would be like visiting Seoul and missing Itaewon. I like a place with a bit of an edge. I like drinking beers with desperate people with nothing left to lose. Plus, it isn’t that big of an inconvenience to remember to bring my switchblade for the short walk from my hotel to the mall.

Patong was definitely a nice break in this trip overall. I paid too much for my hotel room (600 baht!) I drank too much. I smoked too much. I ate at McDonald’s AND Burger King in a two day span. I joked around with strippers. I drank with a 60-year-old Australian sex tourist while watching 7-foot-tall ladyboys try to draw customers to their cabaret. I sat on a curb and drank with a ping-pong show tout. I convinced a bar girl to buy me drinks. I got considerably better at Connect-4. I watched hours of Fox News. That’s the only one that I feel kind of bad about.

Touts in Phuket are ridiculous, as expected. One guy tried to sell me a suit 4 or 5 times, as his shop was on my route to the beach. I told him I was backpacking and have no place to put a suit, but he kept trying. I walked through what looked like a street market but was a gauntlet of touts selling the same T-shirts, and at the end of the block was a dead-end so I had to walk through it again, and they still tried the second time. I was wishing I’d opted for a machete rather than a switchblade. After all, the dude at the Trang night market that sold me my knife had both.

Most hilariously, right before I left Patong, I was in full backpack mode waiting for the bus from the beach to Phuket Town. Some guy comes up to me – “Hello sir, jet ski?”

20120513-182317.jpg
Tuk Tuks on Soi Bangla, the main bar street in Patong.

20120513-182531.jpg
Represent!

20120513-182605.jpg
The first Family Mart I saw in Thailand. There will be many more.

20120513-182704.jpg
This I just don’t understand. Patong is a west-facing beach. (if you don’t read Korean, this says “sunrise.”)

20120513-182841.jpg
The Beach Road by day.

20120513-182919.jpg
Scooter parking for the Bangla bars. This is a tiny fraction of the massive scooter parking lot.

20120513-183019.jpg
Bangla mayhem.

20120513-183057.jpg
On my way out of town, the first time I had seen any blue in the sky. Oh well. I was off to Khao Sok National Park… or so I thought.

Advertisements

From → Thailand

One Comment

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. Bag Packed 2 « Jaehak's Megatrip

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: